The Wonder Years - Transcript

Episode 110: "Eclipse"

Written by Craig Hoffman
Transcribed by Peter Reynders



[Shot of solar flares and corona during an eclipse of the sun.]

NARRATOR: On the afternoon of March 21, 1973, at exactly 2.15 p.m., a rare astronomical event occurred: a total eclipse of the sun. As the sun, the moon and the earth began to move in line...

[Picture flashes to white, with sound effect.]

NARRATOR: ... so did we.


[Shot zooms in from overhead, to next to MR. PLENITZER, who is checking students entering the bus.]

MR. PLENITZER [handing out leaflets]: Miss Corregliano(?), Mr. Godleave, Mr. Cashion, Miss Lackeroo, Miss Burke ...

MISS LACKEROO [to the student behind]: So I called him yesterday ...

MR. PLENITZER: Still lively, Miss Lackaroo? We need to be at the Nearman planetarium by noon. Mr. Gabler, Mr. ...

NARRATOR: A field trip.

[A football jock make “rabbit ears” behind MR. PLENITZER’s head.]

NARRATOR: It was a chance to bring education to the unwashed masses of the junior class.

MR. PLENITZER: Mr. Abramson ...

HARLAN ABRAMSON [eating, mumbling]: Present.

[HARLAN gestures with a Twinkie as he gets on bus.]

NARRATOR: Like Harlan Abramson, McKinley's living monument to polyunsaturated fats.

MR. PLENITZER [looking at a girl who smokes and looks lethargic]: Miss Genaro ...

NARRATOR: Or Mary Jo Genaro, senior year. She became the first girl with McKinley to take her parole officer to the prom.

[MR. PLENITZER takes the unlit cigarette out of MARY JO’s mouth.]

MR. PLENITZER: No smoking, Miss Genaro ...

MARY JO: What was I thinking!

MR. PLENITZER: Mr. Louis... [Louis has a lighter burning.]

NARRATOR: Louis Lanahan. When mankind discovered fire, they had not quite counted on Louis.

[LOUIS is playing with a lighter.]

MR. PLENITZER: Mr. Donlan, Miss Lowell. Alright, people, let's get moving.

[Louis lights the cigarette that MR. PLENITZER has still in his hands.]

MR. PLENITZER: We have a full day ahead of us.

[MR. PLENITZER turns around as Louis ducks under him onto the bus.]

[MR. PLENITZER scares himself with the now lit cigarette. He drops it and stomps it out.]

NARRATOR: And so did the cloud of smoke and the mighty Hi-ho, Silver! ...
(Remark by Kyle Gittins: "Mighty Hi-ho Silver" is a famous Lone Ranger quote)


[The bus climbs on a curvy road.]

NARRATOR: ...We were on the way to the Nearman planetarium. Thirty-four students and one teacher on the road to higher education.


[The students beat each other up in the back of the bus.]

NARRATOR: Such as it was.

MR. PLENITZER: Okay, listen everybody. I must have your complete attention. Please! Gentlemen! Students! People!

[He gets no reaction from the students.]

[The bus driver slams on the brakes. He stands up and faces the students.]

BUS DRIVER: Hey, get shut up there. Turn the damn radio off.

[The students comply.]


[The bus driver sits down.]

MR. PLENITZER: Thank you.

[Shot of bus going along the road.]

NARRATOR: All in all it was the lead opportunity to exchange ideals outside the confines of the classroom.

[KEVIN sits at the window next to WINNIE. ALICE PEDERMIER and CHUCK COLEMAN are turned around in the seat in front of them.]

KEVIN: Truth or dare?

WINNIE: Truth.

NARRATOR: To expand the boundaries of higher education ...

KEVIN: Who is the best kisser you've ever kissed?

WINNIE: The best? That would be [Pause] you. [She smiles.]

NARRATOR: To go where no man had gone before.

CHUCK: Are you going to play for real or not?

KEVIN: We are! Well, I asked her an honest question and she gave me an honest answer. [He smiles.]

CHUCK: Right!

ALICE: I mean, no one is taking this seriously.

CHUCK: Yeah. You could really learn a lot from this game.

ALICE: Maybe that's they are afraid of. Right, Pooh Bear?

[CHUCK put his  arm around ALICE.]

CHUCK: Uh-huh..

WINNIE [to KEVIN]: Okay, truth or dare?

KEVIN: Truth.

ALICE: Make it a hard one.

WINNIE: Okay. If you had to change one thing about me, what would it be?

NARRATOR: Now, of course, moments like this had to be handled carefully.

KEVIN: I wouldn't change a thing.

WINNIE: Oh, come on, Kevin. There's gotta be something you want to change. You can tell me.

KEVIN: No. Nothing.

CHUCK [angrily]: Forget it. This is joke.

WINNIE: Come on, Kevin. You can tell me.

KEVIN: Well, I am! You're perfect. In fact, if I am absolutely forced to pick one thing, that would be it.

WINNIE [curiously]: What would?

KEVIN: Well, I'd have to say, if anything, sometimes you are too perfect.

[Doppler sound effect of honking car passing bus, as WINNIE’s expression sours.]

NARRATOR: Heh-heh!

WINNIE [hurt]: Too perfect?

[Shot of KEVIN.]


[Shot of group of girls in conversation. SHEILA sits behind CINDY (window seat) and MARY JO.]

SHEILA: This field trip chews.

CINDY: I told you we should have cut today.

SHEILA: Oh, yuck! Look at that!

[Shot of HARLAN opening a “Ding-Dong”]

SHEILA: That Harlan kid is disgusting! What is he doing that for?

CINDY: Maybe, he is dieting.

[Both girls giggle.]

[Shot of HARLAN smelling the Ding-Dong.]

CINDY: So gross.

SHEILA: Can you imagine kissing him?

CINDY: No, not without barfing!

SHEILA: I wouldn't do it for a million dollars.

CINDY: I wouldn't do it for anything.

[MARY JO is scratching something on the seatback.]

MARY JO [suddenly]: I'd do it for thirty.

[Camera zooms in closer on MARY JO.  Twangy guitar music starts.]

NARRATOR: There you had it.

[Shot of HARLAN.]

NARRATOR: When the ordinary mortals saw nothing but a fat kid with a cupcake...

[Shot of MARY JO.]

NARRATOR: Mary Jo Genaro saw the challenge of a lifetime.

SHEILA: Twenty-five?

CINDY: Yeah, and you gonna need a hickey for proof.

SHEILA: Yeah. A big hickey.

MARY JO [sad]: You got it.          [Twangy guitar.]

[The camera goes back to Alice, Chuck, Winnie and Kevin.]

CHUCK: Come on, Pooky, we'll show them how it's done.

ALICE: Chucky, what's the one thing you would change about me? Honestly!

CHUCK: I guess you would have to be, uh... your voice.

ALICE [angrily, screaming, high pitch]: What do you mean? What's wrong with my voice?

CHUCK: Not your voice. Ah, your hair.

ALICE [angrily]: You don't like my hair?

CHUCK: No, I like it.

ALICE [angrily]: Oh, you ought to talk, Brillohead!

KEVIN: Come on, guys.

CHUCK: Pooky, this is just a game!

ALICE [yelling]: Fine. My turn. Truth or dare? I choose truth. Who is the weasiest, most disgusting, grossest thing that I have ever done in my whole entire life?

CHUCK [to KEVIN]: Maybe we should not play this anymore.

ALICE [yelling]: I've learned how you really feel about me.

[ALICE gets up.]

ALICE: Get out of my way!

CHUCK: Pooky?

[ALICE approaches LOUIS’ seat. He is reading a magazine about World War II.)

[ALICE stops. LOUIS looks up.]

ALICE: Move over, move!

[She takes the aisle seat. LOUIS returns to his magazine.]

ALICE: I’m so mad I could explode!

KEVIN [to Winnie]: Can you believe that? Getting upset about that stupid game?

WINNIE [coolly]: No, I can't imagine it.


KEVIN: Oh, come on, Winnie. You cannot be that mad... All I said was ...

WINNIE [angrily]: I heard what you said. In fact, I have heard you ... PERFECTLY!

NARRATOR: Alright, clearly it was time to put this fire out.

KEVIN: Winnie, I meant that as a good thing. I mean you are really a nice person. Well, I mean that as a good thing, too. You are like ... Mary Tyler Moore on TV. You know... perky.

[WINNIE nods, the situation seems to calm down.]

KEVIN: Winnie, you gotta admit you've always been kind of well-behaved. I mean, there are certain things you would never do.

WINNIE [steamed]: Like what?

NARRATOR: Hmm, skipping the obvious.

KEVIN: Well, like that for instance.

[KEVIN indicates a boy throwing spitwads at MR. PLENITZER and hitting him at his glasses. Sound effect of hitting and bouncing off.]

[WINNIE opens her purse and gets a piece of paper.]

KEVIN: That's not a bad thing, well, you ...

[WINNIE tears off a piece of paper and chews on it. KEVIN looks surprised.]

KEVIN: It's just, I mean, you don't have to do that. Winnie!

[WINNIE throws the spitwad and hits MR. PLENITZER hard at his cheek.]


[MR. PLENITZER stands up.]

MR. PLENITZER: Okay, that does it.

WINNIE [to KEVIN]: You were saying?

MR. PLENITZER: Excuse me.

[MR. PLENITZER walks sternly up to WINNIE.]

MR. PLENITZER: Miss Cooper!

[MR. PLENITZER bends forward, and speaks in a softer voice.]

MR. PLENITZER: Miss Cooper, did you see who threw that spitwad?


KEVIN: Winnie!

WINNIE: I did it.

[MR. PLENITZER laughs under his breath.]

MR. PLENITZER: I admire your reluctance to turn in your fellow students.

[WINNIE looks disappointed for not been taken serious.]

MR. PLENITZER: However...

[He stands up, turnsto the whole group and raises his voice]

MR. PLENITZER: I will not tolerate no more rowdy behavior on this bus!

[He goes back to his seat. Two boys are making farting sounds.]

[KEVIN looks at WINNIE.]

NARRATOR: And with that quantum leap forward in human dynamics...

[Shot of bus pulling into reststop.]

NARRATOR: ...we moved on to more pressing matters.

MR. PLENITZER [V/O]: Okay, people, we are making an emergency rest stop for Mr.Abramson who suffers from a nervous colon.

[Shot of students giggling.]

[Shot of MR. PLENITZER standing in front of HARLAN.]

MR. PLENITZER: But I must ask the rest of you to please remain in your seats until we reach the planetarium on schedule.

[Shot of KEVIN and WINNIE.]

NARRATOR: It was a thoroughly reasonable request. So, of course...

[Shot of bus door opening. Students unload.]

NARRATOR:  ... we ignored it.


[Shot of CHUCK running after ALICE.]

CHUCK [yelling]: Alice, you have a beautiful voice! Like a nightingale.

ALICE [high pitch]: Shut up, ratface!

[ALICE folds her arms and keeps walking.]

CHUCK [angrily shaking his head, to himself]: I should have chosen dare.

[He trots of after ALICE.]

[Shot of WINNIE catching up to KEVIN.]

[WINNIE wears a red skirt, a blue sweater and holds her light brown purse with both hands. She imitates Mary Tyler Moore.]

WINNIE [mocking]: Excuse me, Mr. Grant, I must see how Rhode is doing. [Transcriber's remark: Lou Grant was character in Mary Tyler Moore.]

[KEVIN shakes his head in disbelief as WINNIE walks away, as Mary Tyler Moore.]

KEVIN: Great.

NARRATOR: It seems that there was something to be said for keeping higher education confined to the classroom...

[KEVIN enters the restroom. The door hits Louis, who drops a bunch of explosives.]

NARRATOR: ... because a little knowledge could be a dangerous thing.

KEVIN [to LOUIS, both are alone]: You dropped something.

[LOUIS picks up his stuff.]

NARRATOR: Enough cherry bombs and ash cans to take out an armory.

LOUIS [speaking with a lower-class accent]: This is something, aren't they? A guy in North Carolina keeps me supplied. See that baby?

[LOUIS hands KEVIN a cherry bomb.]

KEVIN [holding it]: Yeah, it's a ... great.

LOUIS: That's what they make. Beauty, ain't it?

NARRATOR: Great! I was stuck in the men's room with the mad bomber himself.

[KEVIN hands cherry bomb back to LOUIS.]

LOUIS: I got plans for this baby! Look, Arnold, you seem to be a trust-worthy kind of guy. Do you know what's gonna happen at exactly 2:15 today?

KEVIN: Yeah, there's going to be an eclipse.

LOUIS: Nanana, that's not all there gonna be. They got a toilet at the planetarium. The cherry bomb goes in and then ... tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, boom!

NARRATOR: Maybe he was in some sort of Gestalt therapy...

[The front door opens and CHUCK rushes in. LOUIS hids his bombs under his jacket. CHUCK is very nervous and upset.]

CHUCK: There is no use. She does not want to come out of the ladies' room.

LOUIS [calm, to Kevin]: Remember, Arnold, 2:15 sharp. Cover your ears.

[LOUIS leaves.]

CHUCK: Wait, I thought we are supposed to look at the eclipse ...

KEVIN: Forget it, Chuck.

[KEVIN washes his hands.]

CHUCK: What am I supposed to do? I should have played safe like you.

NARRATOR: Yeah, right.

[Suddenly one of the toilet doors opens and HARLAN comes out. He squeezes between KEVIN and CHUCK.]

HARLAN: Excuse me.

[Shot of HARLAN leaving restroom with toilet paper on his shoe. MARY JO waiting for him outside the door]

MARY JO: Harlan, right? Wanna Yodel?

[She offers him a cupcake.]

NARRATOR: Yodel-ay-ee-hoo.

[Shot of KEVIN at sink, the while door closes.]

CHUCK: I was just so confused. I mean there were so many things to chose from.

KEVIN [angrily]: Look, Chuck, I've got my own problems. Okay?

[He leaves CHUCK in the men's room.]

NARRATOR: The way I saw it in the doggy dog world of scientific exploration: There was every man for himself.

[Shot of CHUCK combing his hair with his hands in front of the mirror, looking at his curly hair while the bus honks.]

CHUCK: I don't think it looks like Brillo ...

[CHUCK tries to open the front door but it is jammed.]


[Shot of MARY JO following HARLAN down aisle in bus.]

HARLAN: I think that was really nice of you.

MARY JO: I'm a very giving person.

[HARLAN takes a window seat in the middle of the bus.]

MARY JO: Mind if I share your seat?

[They sit.]

[A boy approaches MARY JO.]

BOY: Excuse me, but...

MARY JO: Go blow, Poindexter!


[He walks away.]

[MARY JO offers some candy to HARLAN.]

MARY JO: How about some Good-N-Plenty?


[Shot of CHUCK banging on restroom door.]

CHUCK: Somebody let me out! I’m going to miss the bus!


[Shot of ALICE looking at KEVIN and WINNIE.]

ALICE [still yelling]: He better not try to sit here either. I don't want to have him anywhere near me.

NARRATOR: As things turned out, that would not be really a problem.

[Shot of bus pulling away.]

CHUCK (V/O): Let me out here! One, two, three ... Four! Hurry up!


[The bus pulls up and stops.]

NARRATOR: And so in the spirit of intellectual discovery and personal enrichment, we finally reached our destination, the Nearman planetarium.

[Students unload behind MR. PLENITZER.]

MR. PLENITZER: And remember, we all meet on the lawn properly at two o'clock. If any of you need to use the restrooms, make sure you go before that.

[Shot of Louis stooping and covering the explosives with his long coat.]

LOUIS [low voice, to himself]: Check. Tick, tick, tick, boom ...

[Harlan and Mary Jo leave through the middle door of the bus.]

HARLAN: Think about this place, alright. We're going to see something new here.

MARY JO: You know it, pal.

NARRATOR: The stage was set.

MR. PLENITZER: People, let's stick together.

NARRATOR: The opponents were in their corners... [Winnie walks a half step behind Kevin.] The lines were drawn.

KEVIN: So, we wanna see ... [Winnie gives him a look and rushes away.]

ALICE [comes quickly from behind]: Have you seen Chuck anywhere?

KEVIN [angrily]: No!

ALICE: If you meet him, tell him I don't wanna see him.

KEVIN: Sure. Fine. I gotta go.

[KEVIN rushes off. ALICE watches him.]


NARRATOR: All in all, it promised to be one heck of an eclipse.


NARRATOR: As for Chuck... [Twangy guitar.]

[CHUCK is climbing through the window of the men's room and runs to the road.]

NARRATOR: From now on, he was navigating by the seat of his feet.

CHUCK: Where is everybody?


[Shot of planetarium ceiling. Camera pans down to show a large Foucault's pendulum.]

MR. PLENITZER [V/O]: So, you see the movement of the earth causes the pendulum to knock down another peg exactly every five minutes.

NARRATOR: So, with eager faces we entered the stimulating world of ... astronomy.

[Shot of some students chewing gum, others moving their heads and watching the pendulum with not much of an interest.]

MR. PLENITZER: Now, at precisely two o'clock we will meet on the front lawn and I will hand each of you a special viewing card.

[Close up shot of pendulum knocking over a peg.]

NARRATOR: With the eclipse of the century only an hour away things were really popping.

[Transcriber's note: The following scene in red was not shown in several reruns.]


[Shot of exhibit sign: CAUTION: GUIDE MUST DEMONSTRATE.]

[Camera pulls back.]

[HARLAN and MARY JO are alone at a display window, facing away from camera.]

MARY JO: What is this, anyway?

HARLAN: It's an electrical step-transformer.

MARY JO: Pretty creepy looking.

HARLAN: Huh? Oh, no! It actually proves electricity is all around us.

[MARY JO takes a long, bored look at HARLAN.]

MARY JO: You don't say.

[MARY JO turns to look at her girlfriends, who are watching them. and makes a gagging gesture.]

[Girlfriends giggle.]

HARLAN: Electricity is at the heart of every chemical reaction.

MARY JO: How about we hang out together?

HARLAN: Really?

MARY JO: After all, ya'll are kinda cute.

[MARY JO takes HARLAN's hand.]

[Shot of both hands reaching out and touching the display button.]

[Shot of both of them as lightning bolts shoot in the display booth.]


[KEVIN is looking at some merchandise.]

[WINNIE walks up,wearing a dark-blue baseball cap, and stands in front of KEVIN. She adjusts the hat.]

WINNIE [friendly]: So, what do you think?

KEVIN: Well, you know ...

WINNIE: I know. It's not me --whoever that is.

KEVIN: Look, I love the hat. Here, I can buy it for you.

WINNIE: Kevin, don't bother. I think I just ... wear it.

[WINNIE leaves the boutique with the hat on. KEVIN looks at the saleslady.]

NARRATOR: Just one little problem here.

KEVIN: Oh God.

SALESLADY: May I help you with something?

KEVIN: No, we were ...

NARRATOR: Let's see.

KEVIN: I ... I was ... just, uh ...

NARRATOR: Let's call it ...

KEVIN: Never mind. [He rushes out after WINNIE.]

NARRATOR: ... shoplifting.


[Shot of WINNIE opening outside door. KEVIN is right behind her. WINNIE sighs.]

KEVIN: Winnie, are you crazy?

WINNIE: I don't know. Maybe.

KEVIN: Ya, well, don't do it again! Next time you might get caught.

WINNIE: I won't worry about it, Kevin. Besides it is your turn!

KEVIN: My turn?

WINNIE: Ya, you don't know, I think about it. You're  pretty well-behaved yourself.

KEVIN: Oh, get out of here!

WINNIE [clearly mocking]: You are nice. You are sweet. And to tell you the truth: Well, I have always admired you. Beaver Cleaver.

[WINNIE giggles.]


KEVIN: Get out of here! I do not.

[They stop walking.]

WINNIE: Kevin, you know, you talk a good game. But I don't see you doing anything.

KEVIN: Fun. Should we go shoplifting something??

WINNIE: I've already got a hat. But I'm sure you could think of something - Theodore.

[WINNIE turns to walk away.]

WINNIE: Bye! [Twangy guitar.]


[CHUCK sees a truck carrying chickens coming up the road in distance. He waves and jumps around.] [Twangy guitar.]

CHUCK: Hey, hey, give me a ride.

[The truck stops. CHUCK trots up and gets in.]

CHUCK: Man, thanks for the ride. You won't believe this but you probably saved my ... [End music.]

[CHUCK pauses as camera pans to driver. He looks like Charles Manson.]

DRIVER: Don't mention.

[Shot of truck driving off.]


[MARY JO stands on a scale labeled: YOUR WEIGHT ON JUPITER. HARLAN is behind her.]

NARRATOR: Let's face it. This eclipse was beginning to affect everybody.

MARY JO: 290 pounds? Now I'm the big load.

[MARY JO looks at HARLAN.]

MARY JO: Oh, I'm sorry.

HARLAN: It's okay, Mary Jo. That's an unusual name, isn't it?

MARY JO: Like you should talk, Harlan.

HARLAN [hit]: Oh, no, I meant it's pretty --like you.

MARY JO: Oh, it's short.


MARY JO [embarrassed]: Mary Josephine.

[She looks at the display and smiles.]

MARY JO: Oh, I bet I weigh a ton on Mars.

MR. PLENITZER: Attention, everybody. It is time to assemble. I want you to follow me to the front lawn.OK, right this way.  [He leads the students out; they follow him.]

NARRATOR: No doubt about it. As the moon's orbit drew closer to the sun, there was more going on here than simple physics..

[MARY JO takes HARLAN's hand and leads him out.]

MARY JO: Come on, let's get out of here.

HARLAN: Oh, yeah. I don't want to miss this eclipse.

MARY JO: Trust me. You won't miss it at all.

[Shot of TV display. A Saturn rocket blasts off the launch pad.]


[KEVIN and LOUIS are walking around, inside the building.]

NARRATOR: Meanwhile I was on a mission of my own.

LOUIS: Forget it, Arnold. I work solo. It's a lot cleaner that way.

KEVIN: Let me do something. I mean you can really help me out with my girlfriend. See, she has this crazy idea.

LOUIS: Okay, okay. Maybe you can be like a lookout.

[LOUIS looks at his watch.]

KEVIN: Great.

LOUIS: When I get to flush.

KEVIN: You got it.

LOUIS: Okay, let's rock n' roll.

[Sound of clucking chickens.]


[Shot of truck on road.]

CHUCK [nervously]: I tell you, we are probably getting pretty close to the planetarium. [Pause] Thanks for picking me up. [CHUCK giggles. Pause] You know what I'm thinking about. You know that Alfred Hitchcock episode, this guy is picking up all these hitchhikers. He's got this big butcher knife and he k... [Dramatic music starts.]

CHUCK: Never mind. You probably didn't see the episode, did you?

DRIVER: Twenty-seven times. [DRIVER smiles.]

[CHUCK blinks, jumps out of the running car and rolls down a slope.]

[Sound of a buzzard.]


[MR. PLENITZER is handing out white cards to students.]

MR. PLENITZER: Remember, don't look directly at the sun! Look at your cards.

NARRATOR: And so with the great event just moments away. Meanwhile I was on a mission of my own.

MR. PLENITZER: We are also lucky to be here. This is the best viewing spot in the entire state!


[Shot of empty stall.]

LOUIS (V/O): Here we are, Arnold.

NARRATOR: Final preparations were being made.

[Shot of KEVIN and LOUIS.]

LOUIS: Ground zero. Isn't that beautiful? [Gestures.]

NARRATOR: One little thing: This wasn't just shoplifting!

KEVIN: Look, Louis, may be that isn't such a good idea.

NARRATOR: This was ten to twenty in the State Pen.

LOUIS: What's the matter, Arnold? Are you chicken?

KEVIN: No, just the whole place can blow up or something ...

[LOUIS playing with a fuse and a lighter]

LOUIS: Yeah, it's a risk.

NARRATOR: That was one way to put it.

KEVIN: Lou, let's forget about it.

[LOUIS imitates chicken noises and lights the fuse.]

[The door bursts open and a security officer enters.]

LOUIS: Uh-oh!

NARRATOR: Was I looking to bail on this whole thing?

[LOUIS throws the bomb to KEVIN who throws it back. LOUIS then throws it into the toilet.]

KEVIN: No, don't!!

[LOUIS flushes the bomb down the toilet.]

NARRATOR: I was a tad too late.

[LOUIS rams the security guard and runs out.]

SECURITY GUARD [runs after LOUIS]: Hey, come back here!

NARRATOR: And realistically speaking, there was only one thing left to do.

[Shot of smoking toilet.]

KEVIN: Oh my God!

[KEVIN runs out to the hallway.]


[MR. PLENITZER is looking at his watch.]

MR. PLENITZER: Okay, here it comes. We're going to achieve totality in 20, 19, 18, 17 ...

[HARLAN comes out of the bushes somewhat dazed, followed by MARY JO looking equally dazed.]

CINDY [to SHEILA]: Oh my God, look at that hickey.

[KEVIN runs down the hallway to the exit.]

MR. PLENITZER: ... 10, 9 ...

[CHUCK comes out of the bushes.]

CHUCK: Alice! Pooky!

[ALICE turns around.]

CHUCK: I made it!

[KEVIN comes out of the planetarium.]

MR. PLENITZER: ... 4, 3, 2, 1 ...

[A big blast is heard, and the camera jiggles. The total eclipse suddenly darkens the scene. Kids scream and scatter.)

[Shot of LOUIS in the middle of a panicking crowd.]

LOUIS: Top of the world, Ma.

MR. PLENITZER [left alone on the lawn, reading from a book, yelling, totally absent minded]: There it is. Isn't science beautiful?

[Sounds of crickets.]

[MR. PLENITZER looks around and sees no one.]



[Shot from inside bus of two security guards leading. They cross the place.]

NARRATOR: I guess you can say that the laws of nature aren't always predictable.

[Shot of MR. PLENITZER standing inside bus, shaking his head and talking to students.]

MR. PLENITZER: Well, not only did you all miss one of the great natural events of the century. But the planetarium, I am shamed to tell you, has now decided to ban any future field trips from McKinley High School.

[KEVIN and WINNIE are sitting together and looking at each other. She is wearing the blue cap.]

NARRATOR: Still, when it came to matters of cause and effect ...

MR. PLENITZER: I hope that you're all very proud of yourselves.

NARRATOR: ... I think we have managed to learn a thing or two. [MR. PLENITZER takes his front seat.] Perhaps that day, despite all the chaos, there really were cosmic forces at work ...

[HARLAN smiles at MARY JO. SHEILA sits behind her and CINDY aside her on the window seat.]

SHEILA: I can't believe you gave him a hickey.

CINDY: That must have been the longest thirty seconds of your life.

[SHEILA and CINDY giggle.]

MARY JO: Shut your face, Cin.

[MARY JO looks at HARLAN.]

[HARLAN rubs his neck.]

NARRATOR: Forces so powerful, so profound, they defied all our attempts of rational explanation.

[Shot of the girls. MARY JO is smiling at HARLAN.]

CHUCK [to ALICE]: And then, finally, I jumped out of the truck and I ran all the way to the planetarium so that I could see y ...

ALICE: Chuck! Instead of making up all these idiotic stories, just be a man for once and say that you are sorry.

CHUCK: But I ... I mean I did.

[ALICE shakes her head.]

CHUCK: I am sorry, Pooky.

ALICE: I forgive you, Pooh Bear.

[They smile and hug.]

NARRATOR: I mean, hey, it has taken only 5000 years to understand the moon ...

KEVIN: Winnie?

NARRATOR: So, may be, we were making progress ...

KEVIN: About today ...

WINNIE: Kevin, I paid for the hat.

KEVIN: I knew that.
  [They smile at each other. Kevin puts his left arm around her shoulders.] [Music plays The Grateful Dead: "Truckin'"] [Shot of the bus going down the road.]

NARRATOR: Then when it came down to it, may be, we learned enough for one day.

Please mail to Peter if you find any errors, or if you have any comments or suggestions. Thanks to Kyle Gittins for the additions and corrections.

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